Self-confidence is all about disregarding your thoughts.
The difference between being self-confident and doubting your abilities is knowing which thoughts to believe. Usually, your thoughts about your abilities have nothing to do with your actual skills. Thoughts are like clouds in the sky; when you look up, they’re there, but they’re not the sky, nor do they color the sky, making it dark and heavy (though it may appear that way.) Much like the clouds, your thoughts are in your consciousness, but they are not the real You.
Thoughts come and go, don’t they?
Yet you are still you, aware of everything, even after those thoughts that left, of course.
Building self-confidence is about not buying into your downer thoughts.
If a thought makes you doubt yourself, feel less than, or be disheartened about yourself, do not buy into it.
Whatever the foul thought tells you, like you’re not good enough, you can’t do this, you aren’t qualified, know it’s all lies!
It just isn’t true!
Thoughts and beliefs don’t always get it right. Have you ever thought or believed something you could have sworn was true, only to discover it wasn’t?
Generally, thoughts and beliefs that fill us with doubts about our abilities are never accurate. So, why, oh why, do we put so much stock in them? It’s time to question their authenticity, especially when they make you doubt your self-worth.
Here are 3 ways to quickly address negative thoughts and naturally build self-confidence instead.
1. Let go of thoughts and beliefs that aren’t serving you.
Eliminating or avoiding thoughts does not work.
Trying to stop negative thoughts by forcing yourself not to think about them anymore is an uphill battle. Have you tried not to think about the thing you’re not thinking about?
Exactly!
It’s not happening!
It’s not even a matter of willpower. Thoughts can be stubborn; when you fight them, they refuse to leave. They may go for a moment, but they will come back, along with doubts or even fear and anxiety. That’s just how the mind works.
A good tip: Avoid resisting thoughts, beliefs, or feelings. The key is to observe them without resistance, even welcoming them so you can easily let them go. By gently releasing them, you free up that pent-up energy, which will eventually exhaust itself.
Just let go of the negative thoughts or feelings and choose a more empowering, confidence-building belief instead.
2. Be selective about the memories you decide to keep alive.
Some memories eat away at you and your self-confidence.
You know, those memories of things you wish you had done, done differently or not done? Or maybe the memories of some hurtful thing someone told you long ago.
The trouble is that memories aren’t about what’s actually here-and-now. Yet, they still can wreak havoc on your here-and-now if not dealt with. So next time a memory makes you doubt yourself, welcome it so you can release it and free that bottled-up energy. No, you won’t welcome the facts of what happened but rather your feelings about it. You can’t change the memories, but you can decide how they will affect you from now on.
Would you let those memories control your here-and-now by having you relive the doubt, pain, and fear all over again? Or would you prefer to focus on releasing those feelings so you can focus on the unlimited possibilities of your here-and-now? It’s a simple but powerful decision for you to make, not forever, just for the moment!
There are unlimited possibilities when you let the energy flow in the moment.
3. Boost self-confidence by acknowledging yourself.
Journaling has proven to be a tremendous tool for building confidence.
Writing down things helps you internalize them more deeply. What could be better for overcoming low self-esteem and gaining a deeper appreciation and confidence in yourself?
If you’re not a writer, you can still build your self-confidence and self-esteem with a minimalist journaling practice. There is no need for writing hours on end. Short three to five daily sentences will help you feel better and break free from doubts and insecurities about your competence and abilities:
Make sure to schedule reminders to read your list from time to time.
Of course, it won’t hurt to write more self-loving sentences if you’re up to it. ;) But keeping it short and simple makes it more likely that you will stick to this self-doubt-slashing practice.
0 Comments